Cheating

Proving only a feeling
Thoughts upon actions, imbibed
The grace of rendering
Uncaring lies
A distinct silhouette
The curtains draw again
Upon the darkened stage
Shadows and ghosts
Of an unspoken rage
Kneeling in the mud
Propping up this shame
Starting over anew
And it is all the same
Tranquil seems the day
But in the end it's here to stay
Internal rended holes
Have their own parts to play
Darkening the stage
Even as the next dance begins

Illusion

Blessed fertility of thoughtful illusion
Simultaneous versions of self and imagination
Pages beneath the creases, reality on abstraction
Universal energetic subsistence, realized ambition
Individual molecular vibration, harmonized persistence
Charged polar regions and variable resistance
Subtle dynamic angular momentum, subtracting maleficence
Sharp perpendicular forces, abrading into chaotic apparition

Promises

There was a day
Made special and important
Reflecting now back at us
In which we made solemn
Our intentions
Defined us, the nature
Of our togetherness
We molded our souls
By our combined will
Passion to exist
As one entity
United against the world

All was said in vain
All was laid to strain
And after all
What did we attain
Between the moments
Each breath exhaled
Making empty the words
Fraught with frost
Grappling now with
Empty ghosts
Pushed into the storm
Vague memories
Holding back the world
Alone

Momentum

Rolling into the next
Momentary frame of existance
The fate of inertia breaks
The fate that inertia makes
Casting shadows and dust
In the mixing confusion
Hueing the strain
Of the randomized forces
Who's shadow now is felt
Only in the momentum
That is left

Adrift

Blunt social instruments
Verbal, incorporeal, unreal
Superceding the id
The subtle creations of
Interrelatedness
Relevance spawned internally
Discourse provokes a balance
Yearning and belonging
Longing and becoming more
To gather together and stay off
The tides of unimportance, regret
Social needs pressed against
Internal conflicts
Perceptions which never quite
Seem complete
Social creatures, who in reality
Never truely
Connect

When

When will I feel
Like I'm OK
Like I can have
The experiences
Of life,
But without love
Like a novel
With the best parts
Edited out,
Leaving only
Void blank pages
A drivel of endless
Meaninglessness
When will I feel
Again

Slipping

The best thing that ever happened
Slipping through my fingers
Blew away, out of sight, grip
Faster than I could react
Or understand the intentions
There was one thing upon which
I thought I could rely
There was only one thing
I ever truly wanted
To entangle my consciousness
My soul, my being, my everything
To inspire and perspire with
Beneath the gray blue skies
The best thing that ever happened
Slipped away while I slept
And although I never knew regret
I am now beyond reason
And my soul no longer guides me
I sense that there is something
Within me which is missing...
Something I cannot name
Slipping away

Depth

How much room do you leave
Between the strokes
Of genius and emotion
How simple a task
To undo the mask
And hone another illusion
How pale a face
Inside your grace
Left to a simple confusion

None can take
What was never given
Without a cumbersome balance
Of intellectual dissolve
To stay the tides
Of a simple slight
There can only be
These shallows of
Uncaring

Sometimes

Sometimes bad things happen
And people don't recover
Sometimes you lose someone you love
Whether to death or disparity
And you never find someone as wonderful
Sometimes the world will show
Its harsh nature to we
Who are so ill-equipped
To handle the blows
The indescribably aweful things
That happen to us and to
Those around us
It is globally ironic
That we do not have the
Mental tools that we need
From birth
To handle the pain and misery
That is inflicted upon us
With such frequency
As to shatter our collective souls
But here we are
Those of us who can
Live on into the next moment
And when you are done
Reading this
You will, too.

Alone

Tears alone in the corner
Feeling as empty as the room
Gnashing at the walls, at the air
At anyone here who will listen
But I'm alone, so it's just me
Wishing for God, praying for a breeze
Some comforting arms in this cold
Turning in the darkness
Pain is like needles against hope
Unbelievable things dancing in my thoughts
Unanounced guests of despair, jealousy
Knives in the dark, and I am alone
Burning passion lingering longer
Against the waves of time and cruelty
Putting out the lights, killing reason
Ransomed for a piece of ignorance
Destroyed for this wordless haze
I cannot comprehend this phrase
Where is the meaning in this pain
I am not the person I used to be now
I am alone

Inner

At all ends conceding
In all things I'm bleeding
Needing a little more
Holding my breath
Regression of inner structure
Progression works as always
Taking away that which
Should have been becoming
Better

Undulating on we struggle
Thru all remaining things we tumble
Breathing a little more
Vision becoming ever narrower
Grasp of consequence following suite
Churning the end into the beginning
Mixing the mist into the air
Becoming the fog and taking the
Care

Self Control

I can feel the blood flow
To my head, producing heat
I can see the fight within
Struggle without victory
There and there is the beauty
I see and I know and it burns
Within my mind again and again
But then there is this other
And amongst the ashes of
Inevetibility
And the draw of the beast
Comes into play the ending
Twisting both concern and care
Around with the immediacy
And broken outcome of desire
And all the while I know
I just know
What I will do

Dysfunction

Dysfunction is
Another word
For denial
And apathy
The tired eye
That turns away
Can only see
Other things
Only cries
When faced with
Betrayed by
Revealed by
Opened briefly to
The aftermath
Impending
Overwhealming
Retreating
Until the eye
Can turn again
Away